The price of being a lifeguard

Yesterday at work, I got a fairly spectacular sunburn on my arms. I admit, it was a farmer's burn.  But after the pain and anguish, you'd think that I'd be more careful today. Well, here's my thought process at work today:

9:00 am  - Aaahhh!!  Little kids everywhere!  What do you mean I have to give fifty swim tests and set up two stands??  I haven't even put my purse in my locker yet!
10:00 am - Oh great, the bathrooms aren't opened yet?  What am I supposed to do about the kindergartener standing here, his expression slowly turning from panic to secret amusement?
11:00 am - Phew, back on stand with some backup.  For a while at least.  Now, where's that sunscreen?  I have a little bit of a base tan now, so I'll use 30 spf.
12:00 pm - Great, we have four lifeguards maintaining three stands.
1:00 pm - I've been on stand for the better part of two hours straight and participated in approximately 3 bajillion swim tests and one rescue.  I should probably lather up the sunscreen again
2:00 pm - The little monsters... um, I mean children, of course... are gone!  Now there are more lifeguards than swimmers at the lake...
3:00 pm - Ah, the sun is the perfect counterpart to the cool breeze blowing along the shore of the lake as I sit reading my book and watching the single toddler who is in the water.
4:00 pm - Hmm, I'm starting to get a little bit hot.  Maybe I should apply that sunscreen again.  Wait... WHAT DO YOU MEAN IT EXPIRED FOUR YEARS AGO???  Oh joy.  Maybe it worked and that warm feeling on my shoulders is just sunshine, not burn?  Nope, I'm in shadow.  GREAT.
4:30 pm - I may as well start raking.  Maybe that way the burn will at least even out across my right and left sides.  And it will distract me as the burn turns me into a freshly-cooked LOBSTER!
5:00 pm - Time to head home.  I guess I'll see how bad the damage is when I get home and look in the mirror.
5:05 pm - Ow, why does my arm hurt in the sun?  Am I turning into a vampire?  Ooh, this really hurts.  Ouch!  I don't like this!  Is there any way to make the shades keep the sun from my arms?  No?  This ride home may kill me.
5:20 pm (standing in front of a full-length mirror in my swimsuit) - Holy hotdog batman.  I didn't know my skin could turn that shade.  And great.  Not only is it bright and excruciatingly painful, even photosensitive, it is splotchy from that sunscreen. Kill me now.
11:07 pm - Aaarrrggghhhh!!!  I am never going outside again!


It was a fun experience.  Hopefully I will just be tan overnight, as happened miraculously last night.  We'll see...

<3
Eliza

P.S. Yes, it really is sensitive to the point where sunlight hurts my skin.  Also hot water, the heater, air conditioning, cold air, clothing, sheets, and lotion.  Who knew?